He's mostly distant. I would ask him, "Did you come home too soon?" "Yes"
Do you want to go back to your nephews? "No"
It's a cold January here. Not only the weather, but he is too.
"Where did you spend New Years eve?" I asked. "I went to the bar with _____ and ______, there is no signal down there... then I came home and it was me and the dog."
"Did you see her over your 2 week break? Or talk?" "No."
Okay. I'm just trying to make sense out of him leaving in the first place, and now the distance and coldness....
He tells me to go get something "sexy" to wear. He send me pictures of what he wants me to wear. I'm confused... I really am. He's still being weird, keeping me at arms length, showing no love, but has no issues taking me to bed almost daily.
And I go willingly.
He's acting so weird. I'm so confused, that I reach out to HER. My best friend told me to go ahead. Most of the time she tells me to get that bitch out of my head...and not give her power. But when I tell her how he is being, and that I will be very civil in reaching out to her, she gives me the green light to do so.... so I do.
Here's my text to her. Click it to view the whole thing. What you need to know is I baited her a bit.. he was not telling me they were in love, he was denying her all together... but I was trying to get her to talk, since he was not. She confirms with the reply "A few months ago" because that would have put it at the timeline that he tells me it ended with them when I found out. It also confirms that she knew he was married by acknowledging something was "wrong" when she got my messages in September. Also, she didn't block HIM... I took his phone and blocked HER. But that's neither here nor there. :)
The month goes on...
A large snow storm is expected to hit our area at the end of this month. By the end of the month, I'm done. I can't take it. He's mean, unless he wants me. He's distant, unless we are in bed. I tell him, "Go back. Move back in with your nephews." "No." he says. "Let me get through this snowstorm at home, so I can dig us out, and then we will see where we are."
The snow hits, and hits hard. We ended up with well over 2 feet of snow. He digs us out, but we are snowed in for a week. No school, no internet, just us. Just the 5 of us in this old farmhouse, beautiful views, and it's just us.
We connected so well. We chopped wood together. We stacked wood together. We spent the days wrapped up in bed together. We cooked, we hung out with the kids, we were together. He was kind, he would catch my eye, smile... He would take my hand and drag me to the bedroom... connection was amazing.
Snow cleared, he went right back to his old self. Distant. Mean.
I'm so confused.
I cry a lot. Our daughter plays basketball. We never ride together, he always has something to do before her games, and he meets us there, watches the game, and goes home in his own vehicle. He's distant at games, he's angry with me all the time. We usually eat out after her game, he doesn't like to go, because he says I'm too sad and it pisses him off.
February 2016
Now I'm pulling away, too. There are a few times he's reached out, asked me out to dinner, tried. But I feel myself pulling away, not trusting him. Not understanding. Afraid that if I accept him reaching out that he will just flip again and be an asshole.
Valentines day rolls around, he's supposed to work that day. He gets up and leaves without saying goodbye, doesn't tell me anything, and he is gone all day. He finally comes home that night with a little plant for me and one for our daughter. He has little cupcakes for both of us.
I don't see that, I am so angry. I throw my cupcake at him. I'm so angry.
ARE YOU TALKING TO HER??? "No. Not since you found out." He wants me to stop asking about her... but I can't think of another reason that he is acting like this to me.
But then the end of them month approaches... and DDay #2 is coming. From a source very unexpected... my son.
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